Monday, May 12, 2008

To Mommies out there ~ "Happy Mother's Day!"

Mother's Day this year is somewhat special to me.



I'm not really into celebrating it that much, because its always very near to exam week every single year. The same goes for this year. The kids would be sitting for their midterm exams today.



Since the kids were small, I would always encourage them to make their own cards, should they want to get one for someone. The last card we bought from Memory Lane was a million years ago. As they grow older, their cards became more creative and unbelievably beautiful. The personal touch was evident. Although once in a while they would make card using the computer, they would still prefer the tradiotional way of using plain fancy card and colour pens. (Even the envelopes are self made!)



So giving me a card for Mother's Day would be done discreetly. I would sort of discourage them to make me one because making one would take hours.... esp Anastassia who really does it in detail.... it could take her 4 whole hours! Obviously a no-no when exams are approaching.

Mia ada Outing Harian last Saturday. On the way back sending her back to college, she asked me whether I could come over again the next day (Sunday), teman dia do her studying (her exam started last Monday sampai this Friday). I said I want to but I cant as I have to monitor adik2 dia at home baca buku. She said OK, no problem.

But I was guilty as hell. Its bad enough that she's staying away from home, masa exam pun I tak boleh accompany her. I really feel bad sebab I admit, I try to accomodate my kids needs or requests if possible, walaupun kadang2 hubby kata i ni ikut sangat. To me, kalau the kids sebut ajer.... walaupun lepas tu dia kata tak kisah, i rasa obliged to do something...... sigh....

As I temankan dia to the staircase towards her dorm, Mia stressed that its okay, she understands that I have to be with Anastassia and Zaryff (and Pu3). I still feel bad though. She sent her things to her dorm, then came back to me for her munchies.... as I gave it to her, suddenly she held out to me a self made black Mother's Day Card. I didnt expect it sebab dalam kepala masih dok guilty pikir whether maybe I can try to come to college masa petang Ahad. Upon seeing the card and Mia saying "Happy Mother's Day, Mama" I can feel the tears starting nak bertakung kat mata ni.

As I dont want her to see me cry, I quickly peluk dia and said "Thank you Mia, I love you....." Mia hugged me back and said softly, "I love you too, Mama". I quickly left and the walk to the car was blurred by my tears. I dont know why I feel so sad. Maybe having Mia away at home has a deeper effect on me more than I want to admit. Or it it because I feel like I'm not doing enough for her during her exam kali ni.

I sat in the car and read the card's contents. Big mistake. Lagi mencurah-curah air mata keluar. I couldnt care less if the girls who were playing basketball kat tepi tu and the group of girls dok jogging kat padang saw me crying or not. Tengah merebeh gila Helena masa tu.....

Sigh.... I miss my first born dearly......


At home, Anastassia slid her card next to my pillow as I was about to sleep at night. I only saw it the next morning. I kissed her, had a mother-daughter talk and hugged her some more. I'm becoming to realize that I see a lot of me in her lately......

Pu3 gave her card to me on Sunday afternoon.

"Mama, Pu3 punya card tak cantik...... Hadiah mama pu3 letak dalam kotak, lepas tu pecah..." Pu3 said sadly.

"Takpa, its the thought that counts, okay." Helena pujuk dia.

"Membazir aje RM2 mama..." Pu3 said, macam nak menangis.

"It's okay Pu3, come sit on my lap" Helena dukung dia and I told her how much I love her.

We talked, I kissed her, played with her hair, kissed her again, when Zaryff came running by....

"Zaryff, kasi la mama card Zaryff" Pu3 called out.

Zaryff stopped and said "Mama, I love you.... tapi card Zaryff tak siap..." he kissed me, the way I like it...... and ran off again with his imaginary car......

I really love my kids so much, no word can discribe the feelings that I have for them.....


Note : Good Luck to all my children for the mid year exam..... Baca Doa, check 3 kali.... jangan careless....

Zaryff, please jangan tulis macam cacing kerawit!!!

23 comments:

Kak Elle said...

Happy mother's day Helena:)tiap anak ada own beauty kan? kesian Mia maybe she wants to give it tp you on the sunday she asks you to accompany her kot.

MAMAMIA said...

Happy Mother's Day!! Mia must have written something really touching, sampai buat U nangis macam tu...

jimi said...

Happy Mothers Day Kak helena, sedih plak baca entri nih. Teachers Day pun nak mai dah. Jimi tulis few entries sempena this big day. Jemput datang baca.

May we keep our spirit to teach our young ones to be their very best.

rose said...

touchingnya..kite nangis tadi baca..huhu..

happy mother's Day..Again..:-D:-D

Madam Tai Tai said...

Hi Helena,

I'm returning the courtesy you have given to me earlier..so singgah sekejap kat sini ya. :-)

You have given such beautiful names to your children. I totally love the names - Mia, Anastassia, Puteri and Zaryff (wonderful spelling of his name!).

It is sad when the children start to leave the nest, one by one. But as parents that would be an accomplishment. They are moving to a better stage in their lives.

Take care and see you again soon!

D.N.A.S said...

Happy Mother's day!!! My son drew a goat on his hand-made card this year. I don't get the message... kekekeke.
Nak makan roasted lamb kot.

ms hart said...

Helena, I'm lost for words already!!

p/s Mia dok dorm mana? As I read your entry, I could almost visualize the scenario!! Huhu..!!

Our doa for all our kids. Memang ni minggu exam!

Helena said...

thx kak elle..... yes each child has its own special beauty in them. And how moms can love each of them differently but yet with the same love....

Ada terpikir the same thing about Mia.... maybe nak give card.... but pikir2... no la.... nak manja jer tu..... hehe

Helena said...

Happy Mother's Day to you too.....

she wrote just 4-5 lines jer... infact hubby glanced at it macam takde benda jer.... but yela... naluri seorang ibu ni... esp dgn anak perempuan.... ada bond... so every word memang touching.... *smile*

Helena said...

jimi pun rasa sedih ke.... Helena sampai la ni tgk her card.... memang la cuaca pun tukar macam redup2 gitu.... hehe

Teachers Day for the kids hari ahad ni.... kamis lepas exam mesti sibuk tulis card and bungkus hadiah....

I like the last paragraph tu.... yes. Tepat sangat statement tu... but what else can i expect from a dedicated n selfless teacher like you?

Happy Teachers Day, Jimi. Teachers like you DO make a difference,....

Helena said...

rose.... alamak... boleh nangis ker...

actually i hesitated whether I should write this entry or not. Sebab Helena selalunya tak tulis benda2 macam ni... yela benda ni sensitive to me, nanti orang baca and kata "apa hal la minah ni.... entah nak menopause ke apa. Benda macam tu pun nak nangis..." hehe

Thank you dear....

Helena said...

hi madam.... thx for dropping by....

Actually the names are not their real names but still nama2 tu ada kene mengena n ada cerita in each of them....

Glad you liked em....

Yes, each journey for the kids is a step closer to their goal in life. And I am blessed to have Mia studying where she is now... she's enjoying life as a student and also as a teen.

Take care...

Helena said...

dnas, hehe a goat.... hmmm.... yela... nak roasted lam kut.... tat is so funny....

i love to see kids punya sketches and scribblings.... Sometimes it can tell you how they feel about things....

A goat.... mmm.... i wonder why..... hehe

Helena said...

mrs hart.... I'll give you a hint...

"Form 2 Mata!!!! Turun sekarang jugak!!!!"

hehe.... sounds familiar?

Helena said...

mrs hart.... yes its exam week.... but somehow I managed to take a peek at CH711 for Desperate Housewives.... hehe. OK tak monitor anak blajar dari depan tv? hehe

(take a peek konon... rasanya berjam i kat depan tv tuh....hehe)

anamiraa said...

happy mother's day sis! i got the card from the twins, three slices of different kind of cakes from hubby while spending 'quality' time with akmal faris in the ward.

;))

perfect!!

mom-of-three said...

kita tau, matahari.. hehehe.. kan mrs hart ( I rasa you were in Mahsuri.. betul x?). Are the classes still TKCNSMB (during my time le, the new form 4 batches at SMB).
My room was sebelah Matahari when I was form 5.

D said...

hope it's not too late to wish you happy mother's day. Your children are so adorable! My prayers to us mommies - to be better moms and raise better children, nothing other than for the hereafter!

silversarina said...

Bila dapat kad dari anak-anak memang rasa sebak, tak kisah cantik ke tidak, takkan dapat diulang cetak kata-katanya dan perasaan ibu menerimanya.

Anak I pun dah start exam . Semoga anak-anak kita berjaya cemerlang dalam mid-term exam mereka . Amin.

Helena said...

anamiraa....

hehe its really easy to please us, kan. Card and cake dah buat us smile the entire day.

My day ended with CH711 - Desperate Housewives Marathon. Just perfect for me. *smile*

Helena said...

mom-of-three, ooo.... bilik sebelah mata yer.... ni mesti selalu suruh budak mata buat tender.... hehe

classes utk form 4 tak sure the same ke tak.....

2 weeks ago was International Day for the Form 2's. Mia jadi spokesperson for her booth - French Weddings. At the same time ada gathering for Old Girls.... ramai gak yang datang.....

I'm so happy that Mia got that task. Suka sangat tgk kids blajar public speaking macam tu.... *smile*

Helena said...

Dear D, Happy Mother's Day to you too.....

I'm sure you had a fabulous time, with those delightful bunch of yours.....

take care....

Helena said...

silverina, yes orang lain baca kad tu biasa jer.... but it's really different for us kan.... every word has it's own meaning, its own memories....

yes, semoga anak2 berjaya dalam peperiksaan mereka.... lepas tu boleh party for Teachers Day!!!! Yeay!!!!! hehe..........